Use instant messaging and video to stay in touch

Every Sunday, my 20-month-old daughter and I call grandma and grandpa. We live in Colorado; they live in Las Vegas. But my daughter knows them by sight as well as voice—we call using a webcam. My parents have literally seen her grow: They saw her take tenuous first steps and clapped loudly as she learned to wave and blow kisses. Grandma has played hide and seek with her more times that I can count.

A bonus to using the webcam is that the instant messaging software for it also allows me to chat instantly with anyone—my girlfriend in Texas is always there to gossip with, or get advice from with a simple "you there?" message from me. Even though I'm the only one of my friends and family to live in Colorado, I never feel alone because someone is always there to talk to.

In this article, we'll discuss both of these options for staying in touch with family and friends.

Get the software and hardware

Here is what you need to get started:

Instant messaging software – Windows Live Messenger

There are lots of free programs that you can use to stay in touch, but my favorite software for instant messaging and video calls is Windows Live Messenger. Here are three reasons I use Windows Live Messenger rather than other instant messaging software:

1. It's integrated with other Microsoft products and services like Outlook and Windows Live, so I can see when my friends and family are online as I do other things.

2. Most people I know use it, plus I can chat with people on Yahoo! too.

3. I can easily send and receive video.

There are lots of other features, but those three are the ones that I use most often to stay in touch. Also, it's easy to set up, which makes it easy for me to use with other people who aren't the least bit technically savvy.

To get it, download Windows Live Messenger from Microsoft. Once you're on the Web site, click the orange Get it free button, click Run in the File Download dialog box, and follow the prompts to install it.

Webcam

The next item you'll need is a webcam. Any brand is fine; just choose something that will work with your computer and operating system. Ideally, you should get one with a built-in microphone. If you don't, you'll need to purchase a separate microphone and possibly a headset. Laptops often have built-in webcams, by the way, but if you purchase one on your own you'll need to plug the webcam into a USB port on your computer and install the software that comes with it. Follow the instructions that come with your webcam to install it on your computer.

Once you have the messaging software and your webcam set up, you can start connecting with friends and family by letting them know your Windows Live Messenger ID and locating them through Contacts and Add a Contact.

Adding a contact and sending a personal invitation is logical and easy with Windows Live Messenger.

This feature is great because you simply enter e-mail addresses and type a personal invitation—Windows Live Messenger can automatically send the message to anyone you designate with information and instructions for installing the software.

When you're ready to start chatting, open a chat with others by simply double-clicking the contact name, typing your message in the text box provided, and hitting Enter on your keyboard.

Making a call with your webcam

Making a webcam call is as easy as making a call from the telephone in your kitchen. The big difference is that you're using your computer to make the call. Here's how it works: Your computer calls another computer using the IP (Internet Protocol) address associated with your contact's e-mail address.

To make a call with Windows Live Messenger:

1. Click Actions.

2. Click Video.

3. Select Start a Video Call.

4. Select a contact to call.

5. Click OK.

6. When the other party picks up, start talking (and viewing!).

In addition to making a call where both parties talk to and see one another, there is another feature on Windows Live Messenger that my husband loves: receiving webcam video. He can't use video at work to actually talk to us but he can receive the webcam video to simply watch what we're doing. There's no sound involved, just video—kind of like those traffic webcams that the local news uses to show you certain intersections at rush hour.

When the other person accepts the invitation generated for a video call or sending a webcam, they can see exactly what your webcam sees (bottom right).

When my daughter is doing something that I think my husband will want to see, I set the camera up and he can watch our activities while he's working. For example, he's seen his daughter create her first watercolor this way. Maybe he can't physically be with us during the day, but he's there in spirit.

To use Windows Live Messenger to send your webcam to someone else:

1. Go to Actions and click Video.

2. Click Send My Webcam.

3. Select a contact from the list provided.

4. Click OK.

Make your webcam available for others to see.

When you are ready to hang up from either a video call or sending a webcam, just close the chat window.

Chatting during video calls

Speaking of chat windows, did you notice that one automatically opened with the person you were calling or sending your webcam to as you made a webcam call? With Windows Live Messenger, you can chat with the person you are talking with—if the sound isn't working, for example, you can send messages quickly to one another to troubleshoot the problem. Or perhaps you want to send a file during your video call—that's okay, too.

Chatting during a video call with others is also easy to do—just open up a chat with anyone else on your contact list and multi-task to your heart's content. The person you're chatting with will never know that you are also on a video call, but be careful: the person on the video call will see what you're doing and where your eyes are.

Video and IM tips

With instant messaging, it's easy to overdo it. Little messages pop up on your screen at the oddest times, and it's difficult to resist them even when a work deadline or other important task needs to be completed. If you have a lot of people in your contacts list, you could spend half your day instant messaging. To help you stay on track and in touch, here are some instant messaging tips:

1. Use the My Status feature to alert others to your availability. This feature tells others at a glance whether you can chat, or whether it might not be a good time for you. Conversely, respect the status of those you want to chat with. If someone has the red Do Not Disturb icon on their name, for example, don't bother sending a message until they become available. To set your status in Windows Live Messenger, go to the File menu and click MyStatus, then select the option that describes your current availability: Online, Busy, Be Right Back, or other option.

Pay attention to availability status icons, such as the Do Not Disturb next to Michelle's name as shown here.

2. Establish regular times for video calls. You can always be spontaneous, of course, but remember that some folks wear pajamas half the day and may not want to pick up a video call at all times!

3. Regularly check the video settings for your webcam. First, check your video settings in Windows Live Messenger by going to the Tools menu and clicking Webcam Settings. When the Camera Settings dialog box opens, you should see yourself in the window. (If you don't, check your webcam properties in My Computer to make sure that you have set up your webcam properly.) Adjust the brightness, contrast, and other camera settings by using the sliding arrow.

Staying in touch with family and friends is actually a lot of fun when you use instant messaging and video. With the way people are scattered around the country and even the globe these days, it's also a practical way to communicate.